Finding Ty
by VipersAngel
Summary: Letting go is the hardest part when the one you love is suddenly gone, but Randy can't let go and he is sure that she is still alive somewhere. When he goes off searching will anyone believe him?


This story is a work of fiction and in no way represents the lives, thoughts or actions of any persons living or dead. The characters are borrowed and I claim no ownership, nor do I imply any association or representation. I make no money from these writings and it is to be used for entertainment purposes only.

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><p>Letting go is the hardest part.<p>

Their relationship had been one of a kind. She loved him one moment. Hated him the next, but he had loved her from the moment she had knocked him to the floor that faithful winter day. He had deserved it, kissing her the way he had.

"Ashes to ashes, dust to dust …" The reverend spoke solemnly.

That couldn't be all that was left.

On his knees, he let the loose bits of ground slip through his fingers. Randy didn't behave the way THEY expected him to. They expected him to be strong, to suck it up and be a man, but they didn't know how he felt. The mourners sat behind him, holding the hands of support and leaning on the shoulders of the ones they loved. While he … he had never been able to call his love … his.

Thunder sounded and the mourners looked to the sky. The dark clouds drifted closer, but Randy did not leave her side. The wet pellets dropped, stinging his freshly shaven head, sending the ones who claimed to care for her running for shelter, but he did not move. He stared at the oak box resting several feet below, covered with lilies, her favorite, and wondered how someone so young, so beautiful and vibrant could be taken from the world that had been so cruel to her at the very moment she had found happiness.

He let his tears fall freely, not caring about the photographers and cameramen lurking outside the cemetery gate. Not caring if they could zoom in on his heartbreak and portray him as a shattered shell of the hero the world knew, because that's what he was. Broken. Crushed. Destroyed.

"Randy," his best friend laid his hand on his shoulder. "The car's waiting."

"I don't care." He just wanted to be with her. "Go on without me John."

He could stare into their sympathetic faces, the very ones they had when he stepped away from the crowd and knelt down by the gaping hole as it swallowed the one he loved.

That's when it became real.

The moment when the bandaged and frail body, crippled and charred beyond repair withered and died in the hospital room had not seemed real to him. She had gone away. Left him because of one stupid mistake, but she was coming back. He knew she was coming back … until the moment the closed casket began to slowly descend into the darkness … that's when he could no longer believe it was a just a dream.

"Randy, come on buddy." John took his arm in an attempt to help him to his feet, but in Randy's mind he was ripping him away from her. He swung wildly. John ducked, caught Randy's arm and shoved it behind his back to subdue him. Randy settled down and crumpled. His friend pulled him into a hug and he clung to him and sobbed. He balled his fist and jerked at John's jacket.

"Let me be with her. Just let me be with her."

Everyone whispered in the large living room of John's home while the wind raged outside as if Ty herself was protesting the unfairness of life. Randy sat a recliner with his hand propped up under his chin, staring at the sheets of rain that ran down the large picture window.

Laughter. What could anyone possibly find so funny?

"You always knew when Ty was around." Someone chuckled. "Because Randy would always be laid out on the floor." It was Carrie, John's wife and Ty's best friend. He heard her sniff back her tears.

"Randy never would give up trying to get her to go out with him and every time she would knock him cold. I don't think I ever saw another woman who could get the best of him." They tried. They all tried to think of what they loved about her.

"The way the two of them were, it really was a shock when we found out that Emma was Randy baby." Carrie went on.

Emma toddled around the home, a big smile on her face. She was barely one and she would never know her mother. She would never remember how Ty had rocked her for hours when she was restless or how she had stayed up all night worrying over her when she had a fever. But she looked like her, the same big blue eyes, the same dark hair and the same fiery personality that Randy had loved.

A heard a loud scream, a scream of pain.

"Mama." He jumped from his chair and rushed across the room. He scooped Emma up in his arms and held her tight. "Mama."

"I know baby, I know." He cried as he twisted his body from side to side to comfort her. "I miss mama too." Emma didn't understand why her mama wasn't there. How could he explain to her why everyone was so sad and how it was because her mama was never coming home?

All his friends kept telling him is that he had to let her go that night as he begged on his knees for Carrie, who was Ty's power of attorney, not to sign the papers and allow them to turn off the life support machines. But he could not accept it then. He couldn't say good bye. He could only stand by helplessly and watch Ty fade out of his world.


End file.
